If we ever meet again,

I want to take you to a quiet place.

A place where it is just us two and nature.

A place where we don't need to say a word.

A place for us to just be.

Memories...

After unpacking my things in my dorm room, I decided to go for a walk to clear my sinuses and head. Somehow, I ended up on that gravel path we walked together last spring for that geology lab extra credit assignment. Although I felt really dumb that I lead you the wrong way, I was secretly glad that it was just us two walking there together.

I walked on the side you walked on, and I kept thinking back to that day... I wonder, what would it have been like if you were on my side as I walked? I also wondered what it would have been like if we were walking that path together holding hands, talking or just staying silent. I wondered a lot of things on that long stretch.

I got the the end and found the little wooden outstretch onto Lake Matoaka with the bench. It was eerie and foggy and a little cold, but I stood there reliving that bright(er) day. I remembered you skipped a couple of rocks, and you were joking about me getting into the water... I laughed you off and probably raised my voice at you in protest like I usually did.

I tried to skip a couple of rocks like you, perhaps to feel as if you really were there with me, but, well, it didn't quite work. At all. I just laughed it off and turned and left.

Favorites

I remember that day when I was with Aaron and we saw you standing at the bus stop.

What you said to me (us) will always be ingrained in my mind.

"Hey, it's my two favorite people!"

You may never know how happy those six words made me that day.

A Winter Dream

I don't know why I dreamt of him last night. I find it weird because I consciously don't have feels for him, but I have noticed that I have been thinking of him quite often for sometime. But the dream... it was so real. Like, it was a traditional wedding, and there were colors everywhere. I remember some people from his side [of the family] weren't too joyful, and in the dream I knew it was due to the nature of our relationship. What is strange is that I could see the two of us, yet I was experiencing everything at the same time... almost like a semi-out-of-body experience.

But the happiest part of it all was when he spun me around like a child. It could only have been no more than 5-7 spins, but it felt like 100. I remember us two smiling so genuinely, and joy and happiness was bursting from us so much. I don't know what all this could mean, so I'll just see how things play out.


~
This was actually a dream I had about a year ago on January 28, 2012. I wrote the above down when I woke the next morning in a journal but removed the page when I stopped using it. I hid it in a drawer in my room at home and while packing my things for my return to school, I found it.

I Don't Even Know If I Like You

You've been on my mind many times. I've felt the fluttering butterflies, the heart racing, the warm cheeks. I've gone to your Facebook page so many times just to see if there was anything new. I loved it when you started chatting to me first, even if it was about school and housing things. I missed that.

Since I've gotten to know you, I love the kind of person you are. You're genuinely kind, and a great conversationalist. Is that a word? I don't know. What I do know is that you've done something to me.

I've been in this part of town so much, at this street corner and at that light trying to figure out what these feelings are. I can't figure out how I should proceed. Should I just let the red light keep me still, or go with caution on the yellow? Full speed ahead for green? I don't even think the traffic light is working properly, because I'm spinning around.

Honestly, I think I do have feelings for you yet at the same time, I know something is holding me back, keeping me from knowing for sure that I like you. I think it's just... perhaps I just want your company for now.

If from what I gathered from our conversation is true, then one more semester and a summer is what is keeping me from seeing you again. I wonder how you'll look. Act. Be. I'm sure you'll still be the same from when I saw you last.

And right now, I think that just having you around is what I need.